What I Learned Men Want

So, armed with what Ms. coworker told me, I started to research what men really want from women (cause I wasn't sure if she was exactly right.)

I asked close men friends and read lots of books WRITTEN by men trying to figure out what men REALLY want in women. And guess what?

There are some universal similarities, but there are also some differences. Almost all men want a woman who is attentive, who "gets them," and appreciates them, but other than that, there's really no cut and dry answer here.

Men have different personalities and preferences just like we do. Men who like to play games or who are "players" will be attracted to a higher maintenance woman who like to play hard to get. (The beautiful ice princesses.) (I did not want this type of guy.)

Men who are down to earth and mature are more likely to be attracted to a warm, loving and open person who doesn't make them work so hard to understand what she wants, who she is, or what she's about. (He cares more about your personality than someone who looks flawless. This is the kind I wanted!)

In other words, like attracts like in successful, easy relationships. Does this mean that opposites don't attract or can't work? Not at all.

But, what I learned is that it's optimal that, deep down in each person's core, they agree upon their level of commitment, affection, and optimally, their world view.

At the end of the day, I came to believe that a decent man is more likely to fall in love with a woman who makes him feel attractive, interesting, and competent than one who looks like Paris Hilton. Now, the woman who is able to do this is not going to be the same for all men. One size does not fit all.

I began to get confirmation of what I had sort of suspected all along, that in order for me to be more successful and find "the one," I was going to have to change the way I was attracting these men.

Somehow, I was sending off the wrong signals into the universe. And, the universe was responding by sending back the men I was asking for. But, obviously the way I was asking (and who I had been asking for) had been all wrong.

I was starting to see things more clearly, but I need to perfect this technique. (And I eventually I did, but not before learning a few very valuable lessons first.)